


The Trouble with Thirst Songs

by Dgcakes (ficsnfun)



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-05 00:52:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15158843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ficsnfun/pseuds/Dgcakes
Summary: Yamato privately writes a rather explicit song about wanting Taichi to rail him. Things get extremely out of hand.Cast is in late college years. Post Adventure and 02, Tri & Epilogue are ignored. Short chapters and just a fun time all around.





	1. ~ Writing it Down ~

There was a point where Yamato was sure he was a respectable artist. He had some kind of integrity and wrote actually decent songs. Deeper thoughts and hard raw emotions, the thing that kept his various bands afloat even as this hobby continued through college. The sort of thing that had him able to say he sold albums. And yet here he was, writing the most garbage, trashy, purely smut song lyrics he had ever written. This was absolutely filthy, seriously. 

The blond sat at his writing desk, leaning on one arm, pushing up his hair as he tapped his pen on the paper with his other hand. He was being kind of overdramatic here, really. This wasn’t some kind of horrific selling out garbage or something. It also wasn’t like he hadn’t written sex songs before, just generally not this explicit...or accurate to his desires. Being vague and coy and having a good time with metaphors in a rock song was one thing. Writing what was essentially a lyrical neon sign begging a particular person to fuck him was an entirely different matter. Yamato Ishida - horny on main and in trouble.

Really this was Taichi’s fault, absolutely.

Ok so...a lot of the songs he’d never show anyone were Taichi’s fault. Being in love with your best friend, being extremely private about not just your feelings but also your preferences and love life in general? Just a lot of it resulted in very messy emotional problems and he had quite a lot of intense feelings to begin with so having to deal with even more meant he had to actually find an outlet for those and writing songs he’d never use - or would have to heavily edit - was just the norm. Usually they were just very emotional or ridiculously sappy - he’d never actually ventured into this territory before. At least, not lyrically - he ventured there mentally plenty.

It didn’t help that he and Taichi had a very messy relationship in general. They could be extremely volatile with each other; they were also ridiculously close for ‘best friends’; hell - they lived together! Not that their friends knew it, and where the line between ‘we’re just roommates’ and ‘we cuddle in bed enough that your room is really more juts storage at this point’...he didn’t know where that line had been, but they crossed it and Yamato was absolutely not going to do anything that was going to result in him going back to the far side of that line. He’d been to the side of the line that didn’t involve being held at night by Taichi and he wasn’t going back to that side, thanks.

Today had been a particularly bad case of ‘save Yamato and his poor bi soul’ seriously. He’d just meant to meet Taichi after practice and really, he knew the risks going into the locker room. But he knew the team and it’s not like he didn’t LIVE with Taichi - he saw him post-shower plenty. That was usually not an issue….but today, well…

He’d shown up early, heading into the lockers to grab Taichi after practice and head to pick up their dinner for the night. Usually one or both of them cooked but Taichi had actual family obligations tonight so they were grabbing a quick meal together before he went out to some stuffy evening awards function, that you didn’t actually get to eat at, with his family. On the one hand, it meant they didn’t get to hang out that evening and dinner would be small. On the other hand, Hikari had worked hard for these accolades and Yamato would absolutely have been disgusted if Taichi did anything less than waste a night doing something he didn’t want to in support of her. Which thankfully was one of the few things Taichi did they didn’t have to disagree on much - being supportive siblings was a very important thing to both.

So here he’d been, casually in the locker room, waiting for Taichi and talking to one of the guys on the team when he’d happened to glance to the side. And really, the towels at home were definitely better - had way better coverage. The ones he kept for sports only not so much. That was absolutely a view of legs and hips that he did not get on a daily basis, and being reminded that ‘Yes, Yamato, your best friend plays sports and has a muscular structure that would not look bad in marble’ was just a very very rough experience for him today.

_“Taichi, put some fucking clothes on. We have places to be!” he snapped the words across the room at his friend and rolled his eyes, trying exceedingly hard to make the annoyance real and try to wipe this image from his mind. But no good, he was going to be seeing this on the back of his eyelids for a bit. It was a good thing Taichi was kind of a blockhead about some stuff or he’d catch Yamato easy when he got like this. He already saw through him so well in other matters._

_“Uh oh, the boss calls. I better get presentable. See you guys tomorrow.”_

Now that dinner was over and Taichi was off and away at whatever event he was at, Yamato was alone with his thoughts...and with his _feelings_. It was absolutely annoying and he was not happy being stuck home alone, the one night he apparently didn’t have practice or anything to do, and he was here just thinking about how bad he wanted Taichi to do him. He didn’t feel quite in the mood for his usual solution to that problem tonight, so the alternate solution had come into play: he had to write out the feelings till they went away.

To give himself some credit, they were decent lyrics. His notes, scribbled all over the page, for the actual kind of song this feeling would suit so well were passable. This is something that COULD work, if he’d ever share it. Which he wasn’t going to. This was getting locked in the ‘never seeing the light of day’ box of songs he’d written, and getting forgotten like the others.

Unfortunately for Yamato...that isn’t what actually ended up happening…


	2. ~ Jamming it Out ~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun with the band. I made up names for them. -shrug-

“We should probably go over that one again.” Yamato huffed a frustrated breath after they finished yet another run through of one of their only new songs. He huffed against when he heard the groan from his bandmates. 

“Come onnnnn, we have this one! Let’s do something else!” Keiji whined, letting his bass drop to just hang on the strap about his shoulders. 

“We only have so many new songs right now, Yamato, and more would be helpful.” Haru suggested from the keyboard, hoping his less whiny tone would win him favor. 

Yamato grumbled, trying to not be unreasonable here but they did need to improve their current music! He wasn’t being too picky, he just knew this could be better. 

A soft snort was the first warning he got that Suzu was joining this little mutiny. And suzu was the most dangerous to get involved. Yamato braced himself for where this was going.

“You guys need to learn the trick to dealing with Yamato like this. We have _~our advantage~_ here tonight!” Suzu said from where he sat, leaning forward on his drums with a grin. “Taiiiiiiiichi, your hubby’s being too high strung again. Make him chill out?~” he singsonged in the direction of the armchair across the room.

“Look who actually remembered to give me my proper title.~” Taichi’s voice carried back to them with such ease and Yamato reflexively rolled his eyes at this nonsense, just like always.

Some nights - usually Thursdays - when his practices and classes were done far earlier than Yamato’s band went, Taichi’d come join them so he could walk Yamato home. He’d just chill out in an armchair in the room, playing on his phone and generally just being a lump or talking to the band on breaks. That was the longest they tended to have what the group dubbed their “advantage”. 

They usually saw Taichi for a little at most practices when he dragged his and Yamato’s lunches up there so Yamato would actually take a real break for a change. It did tend to put Yamato in a better mood - put all of them in a better mood, really, a breath of fresh air from them dealing with each other - and it, along with the routines had led to the joke that Taichi was his boyfriend. When he’d loudly refuted it, saying “He’s not my boyfriend!” sharply, they had almost considered stopping. 

At least, till Taichi - in his infinite wisdom and unintentional cruelty - had said “Yeah come on, I am obviously his husband. Get it right.” 

So now Taichi was just referred to as his hubby. He claimed it was equally annoying but pointless trying to dissuade them but secretly, Yamato’s heart fluttered a little whenever someone referred to them like they were married. Or whenever Taichi’d bounce his eyebrows suggestively at the title or jokingly say, “I would but you know I’m very taken.” whenever Suzu would flirt with him.

Presently, Taichi didn’t even bother sitting up from his seat at Suzu’s question. “You know he’s less likely to actually change his mind when you’re very obviously trying to get me to convince him, right?” he called. 

“Please, Taichi? What good is having you hang around if you can’t unwind him some!” Keiji had joined this attempt to ply Taichi.

With a heavy sigh like it was such hard work, Taichi shrugged and sat up, looking over at Yamato, leaning on his arm. “You are being kind of a dick and I’m getting sick of that song. You’ve done it like four times already.”

Yamato shot Taichi a dirty look. “It’s a band practice - we have to actually practice, Taichi. You aren’t required to be here, you know.”

“Nah you’d get lonely without me.” he actually stood up this time and walked over to sling an arm around Yamato’s shoulders and lean a good portion of his weight on him, a playfully affectionate gesture that was way too effective for all the wrong reasons. “You do need some new material. Why not let them go wild with some of the stuff you’ve been writing?” 

Yamato tried not to make leaning into Taichi’s touch as obvious as he felt it probably was, “I’m still editing those.” 

“It’s a communal activity here, Yamato. Let them get their hands on some of the drafts and see what you guys come up with. You’ve done that before and it worked out.” he may not know a ton about music, but Taichi knew a decent bit about Yamato’s process from the more than a decade of dealing with him and his various bands so really, it wasn’t awful advice.

“We haven’t had a jam session in a while…” Yamato finally relented, taking his guitar off and setting it on the stand for a moment.

Giving himself an excuse to slide out from under Taichi’s arm and ignore the cheers from his bandmates, he darted over to grab the bag he usually kept his notebooks and folders of drafts he was still working on. 

He tossed the bag to the clustered up bandmates. “Find something that looks fun and let’s go.” 

Suzu, Keiji and Haru lit up at this, immediately digging into the bag like they were wolves descending on a deer. They all knew how rarely Yamato let them see unfinished works or just pick and choose what he wanted to share. Meanwhile, Yamato himself looked to Taichi with a raised eyebrow.

“Hope you’re happy. “ 

“The important part is _they_ seem happy, and _you_ don’t have a riot on your hands.~” Taichi ruffled Yamato’s bangs a little, forcing the blond to fix them.

“Oh what have we heeeeeeeere?~” Keiji said, looking in wonder at something Haru had pulled out and was looking over.

Suzu let out a long whistle. “We definitely have to do this. That is not even a question.” they took their prize and Suzu darted off to put the bag back and hop on drums before Yamato could start questioning their quick choice.

“Guess that’s my cue to get out of the way again.” Taichi winked and went back to his chair to flop down. 

Yamato did his best not to watch him walk back to it - he had a pretty damn nice walk. Still, more important things to focus on! He quickly picked his guitar up again and looked to Haru. “Ok what are we doing?” 

Haru gave a sort of shy blush as he held it out to show Yamato. “This one. I really like it, it’s really unique compared to some stuff we’ve done and I think what I see of your work on it, it could have a really fun sound, but there’s a lot of room for us to add.”

Yamato was really wondering what was getting this kind of reaction from them till his eyes caught the pages Haru was holding up, and he paled, eyes going wide. No! That was supposed to be in the box at home. He remembered putting it in there. He distinctly remembered burying that with the rest.

Unbidden, a memory returned to Yamato of rushing to go out the other day, of putting his spread out lyrics pages hurriedly into his bag and knocking off the box and some of the loose pages. When gathering everything back, he must’ve mixed that one in with the ones he actually wanted to work on. 

A chill ran down his spine. His first instinct was to scream “NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!” at the top of his lungs and shout at anyone who asked him why. This was such a stupid idea! These idiots had to get whiny about practicing and Taichi - Taichi had to suggest this whole stupid idea!!!!

But a creeping thought - a memory of feelings - slipped back into his brain. Not just a reminder of the feelings he’d had on writing this, but the ones he’d just been pushing off mere moments before. It wasn’t exactly like it was a sentiment he couldn’t express musically or it wouldn’t be a good creative exercise…and really, what better revenge on Taichi for his stupid suggestion was for him to jam and fool around with a song about how bad he wanted Taichi to bang him, with the man himself in the room.

A blush coated Yamato’s cheeks and he had to lick his lips before he was able to clear his throat and speak properly. “Fine. Let’s do this.” he turned quickly and focused in on his guitar, working on this tune and music with the others. What was the harm in working on this song with the others for one play session? Not like they were really at a stage where something concrete would happen with it. 

All in good fun...till it wasn’t.


	3. ~ Making a Hit ~

“Are you kidding me?!?! No, why would we record that?” Yamato snapped. It was bad enough that that was a song complete enough to even suggest was usable, but recording it?! This was so many levels of bad idea.

He had really brought this on himself just the same. Yamato had let them jam around with it once and even that was too many times. But being talked into it a few more times? Working on it more? That had been so stupid of him. It had been coming out so interesting! And he’d been having fun getting to play around vocally with how he used the lyrics and it was just so FUN he’d let himself get carried away and forget what a completely absolutely fucking garbage idea this whole business was. 

The problem was, Yamato really loved the songs he wrote privately for himself and no one else. They were his most passionate, most real and aggressive and often most off the cuff. Sometimes he’d say things and look back later and ask himself where the hell he’d pulled that from because it was not his rational, thinking brain. This song especially was chock full of those sorts of lines.

 _‘You’ve got killer thighs, now slip one between mine.’_ What was he thinking even writing this down? Well ok, he knew EXACTLY what he was thinking. That was pretty obvious from the line itself. But who let him write this down on paper? Why was this a good idea? WHY DID HE LET ANYONE ELSE READ IT? MULTIPLE TIMES?

It was even worse that this was probably one of the band’s favorites, for various reasons. Suzu’s because he was a perv like that and enjoyed the fact they had a raunchy explicit song about Yamato just wanting some action, and loved teasing him about making it obvious how much he needed to unwind. Keiji enjoyed that he got to do some actually very different things musically at all sorts of sections of the piece, really throwing himself into the instrumentation - he was less experienced than the rest of them at coming up with how something should sound so he really got to explore a lot with this one. And Haru? Haru just blushed and said he enjoyed how happy the others were with it, but given Yamato had also heard him singing along with it at points, he had a feeling it was just relatable for him.

“It’s just so good and we all worked hard on it! I’m telling you, it’d be a shame to NOT actually do it for real.” Keiji was the most emphatic about why they should record this, as always. 

“And _I’m_ telling you, that some things are too personal and we really don’t need to keep records of them or play them out in a recording studio.” Yamato sighed heavily. He knew where Keiji was coming from, really! He felt that way too, deep inside he was as fond of this piece as the rest of them, but it was just one of those things that he was so scared of having actually come back and bite him in the ass. 

Any musical acknowledgement of deep feelings he had towards someone - be it his family, his friends, Taichi - it came with risk. The risk that it’d come out who it was about, what it was about, that it’d come back to them. He wrote them out as songs because these were things he couldn’t just easily express to the people in question. Or in certain cases, couldn’t make plausible to audiences outside of a very specific group - he had plenty of perfectly acceptable and safe for listening songs about and for Gabumon but most people wouldn’t get a song about or to a digimon, and it lost something making it more generic. That was about the only exception really - all the rest, if he kept it written but locked away, it was to keep it from getting out.

Actually jamming out to the song the first time with Taichi there was risky, but not that risky - they weren’t at a point he’d be actually singing the song, for one thing. But then they’d kept working on it, seriously putting some care into this! Now, it was at a point where it was complete and if he recorded it, performed it, let anyone hear it, was someone going to find out? Was Taichi going to find out?

“You know…” Haru said quietly, almost reading his thoughts but probably just getting his issue on a general level, “the song is specific in plenty of ways but it’s not particularly obvious. A lot of people could easily relate to it or whoever it’s about...it’s plausibly just a very well thought out fantasy?”

This was...such a bad idea. So so bad. He must really want to do this song, some part of him wanting to open up about that because that was such a weak justification but he wanted to be convinced so badly. 

“ _Fiiine._ ” Yamato threw up his hands. “We’ll do that one too.”

Suzu gave a soft chuckle at the drums. “Good because we could really use a real jam to round out the new album.~” 

This was such an awful, awful idea and it was going to bite him in the ass.


	4. ~ Realizing the Mistake ~

‘Kill me.’ 

‘I thought we were in agreement Taichi was going to be the death of you. Can you just have him do it? My schedule’s a little too booked for murder charges just now.’ 

Sora was no help, as usual. By which he meant she was a huge help and he’d be lost without her in so many ways but also she really just responded with his dramatics too casually sometimes. Ugh. 

‘He is going to be the death of me. So am I, apparently, but also him, Inadvertently?’

‘Yamato, you’re going to have to tell me what happened if you want sympathy.’

‘New album. Song on it I didn’t really mean to write...or share...or record...or release...or have anyone hear but is now on an album that is out and public and I am just being hit with the realization of what this means for my life.’

‘So what you’re saying is you’ve made bad life choices and now regret them. Alright, how bad is it? What is the song about?’

‘Taichi.’ 

‘Okay, we are already starting on a pretty bad note there. What about him? How salvageable is this? Is it sappy stuff or is it heartfelt love confession levels?’

‘Try blatantly begging him to screw me level’

There was silence for several minutes with the blinking ‘...’ to indicate Sora was typing. Either it was a long message or, more likely, she was rethinking what to say several times over. Finally, she came back with a response.

‘Which track is it? I better hear how bad this is.’

‘Second to last one. Thanks.’

There was a reason he knew he could count on Sora in times like this. They may not have worked as a couple - it didn’t suit either of their needs - but they worked amazingly well as friends and confidants and he was so glad he hadn’t lost that with his stupidity back when they were together.

Still, he had to actually WAIT for her to finish listening to get any sort of help or sympathy in this matter. So he had to distract his anxiety with something else. And really, if anyone would be divorced from human concerns of this type it’d have to be a digimon.  
Flipping through his contacts, he was able to bring up Gabumon’s pretty easily. Koushiro hadn’t mastered that whole ‘allow people to enter the digital world without a D3’ thing but he had at least gotten ‘regular communication and contact with your digimon partners’ sorted out. Which is good because Yamato absolutely needed regular interactions with Gabumon in his life. Even if he wasn’t sure he was going to be able to survive the embarrassment and cute of his partner learning how to cell phone.

He poked the chat button to send Gabumon a phone emote. Gabumon was one of the better ones at typing but he was still learning it. However, he’d absolutely mastered discussions by emoji so it was pretty easy for them to back and forth, and this was their usual method of discussing if one could take a call right then. 

Almost immediately he got back a smile emote and several exclamation points. Yes, Gabumon was free, please call him! 

He had to hold in a laugh at that as he pressed the call button - it was too cute but his digimon would probably not appreciate being laughed at.

“Yamato!!” he was immediately greeted on calling by the happy sound of his partner - who seemed to be near a river or something, he could hear the water in the background and splashing.

“Hello to you too.” even just hearing Gabumon’s voice could ease his anxiety. Even if it was a temporary soothing, it worked wonders. “What kind of trouble are you getting into?”

“We’re having a party. Gomamon and Palmon are fishing. Agumon fell in the water again…” Gabumon explained, and the sounds became more easy to identify. “What are you doing? Are you well?”

“Yes...I’m ok…” Yamato felt bad lying to Gabumon but really it wasn’t quite a lie. He was ok and he was going to be ok he just needed to get over himself and his fears. “I put out a new album.”

“Ah...are you nervous about it?” 

“A bit, yeah.” that was an oversimplification but it worked.

“I can’t wait to hear it! You’ll play it for me right? I always love your music.”

Yamato nodded then remembered, phone call, he can’t see me. “Of course I will, Gabumon. Just...after I’m more used to it being out.”

“That’s ok. I can’t today anyway - we’re having a party with fish.” 

“So you told me. I better-” he heard a splash, “-did Agumon fall in again?

“He does that a lot.” Gabumon agreed. “I don’t want to get too near the water or my fur will get wet but he keeps trying to fish even though he’s really bad at it.”

“He and Taichi are boneheads like that.” Yamato chuckled fondly. “Anyway, I’d better let you get back to that. Have fun.”

“Ah! Are you sure? Do you need anything?” Gabumon sounded anxious for a moment, clearly worried he was neglecting his partner by paying attention to this fish party.

He huffed a little laugh and smiled fondly - trust Gabumon to always know how to make him feel appreciated. “No, I just wanted to hear your voice for a little. Thanks.”

“Ok. Bye bye!” Gabumon still hadn’t mastered hanging up the phone so Yamato had to end the call after their goodbyes. 

After the call went off his screen, he was able to see Sora’s latest message. 

‘Well I have good news.’

‘What’s that?’ he typed back eagerly. 

‘I don’t have to kill you.’

‘Why not?’ 

There was no way she had found some loophole to make this good and spare him.

‘Because you’re going to die of shame anyway when your brother hears it.’ 

………..fuck. He hadn’t even thought of that.


	5. ~ Compounding the Error ~

The phone rang and rang in his hand and inside he was on fire. Please, please just let him have been in classes and not gotten to listen yet. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeease. 

He was not ok with this, not ready for this chapter of his life. He did not need his supportive, always listened to his work very intently, wonderful baby brother listening to this garbage ass song he wrote about wanting his best friend’s dick. Taichi was like a surrogate big brother to Takeru too! This was wrong on a lot of levels! He absolutely needed to get him to skip this song!

He got Takeru’s voicemail and had to hang up fast before he said something that sounded too much like a kuwagamon trying to fit in a subway car. Because that’s about what his voice was doing at this point. It is not working and he is just desperately waiting for the ground to swallow him for his shame.

Yamato put his phone down and buried his head in his hands, sitting on the couch and trying to not panic himself into a state. He was home early as they’d taken off from practice that day in celebration, but right now he’d love to be doing anything but thinking about the implications of what he’d done. At least he was home alone just now. 

He jumped about a mile in the air at the sound of his phone. Right, right he had JUST CALLED SOMEONE and they were CALLING HIM BACK. Geez Yamato, leave you alone for five minutes and you went nuts. He was far too tightly wound for his own good.

Quickly he answered the phone. 

“H-hello?” he hadn’t even looked at who was calling. Fuck he probably should of.

“Did you run a marathon to get to your cell? You don’t need to go to such lengths to maintain your figure you know.~” 

Ugh. Fuck. Worse than he expected - it was Taichi.

“Who let you talk?” Yamato growled back, flopping back on the couch.

“You did, when you answered the call. Anyway, I just wanted to know if you wanted anything from the store. Sora and I are going to the grocery after class so I can help her carry and if I’m going anyway I might as well pick shit up for the apartment.” 

“Yeah you eat enough of it.” he grumbled, sitting up and going to check the fridge and see if he actually had a list up yet. As he did, a thought hit him. “You haven’t listened to the album yet, have you?”

“I’m working my way through it.” Taichi assured him. “Not like I wasn’t there for half these songs in the works. I made Sora laugh that I already knew the words to track 3.”  
Yamato groaned. That one they’d had to practice a lot because some of the notes weren’t hitting right - it wasn’t till they’d redone a few musical sections that it actually started sounding good. Still that meant Taichi WAS in progress on it.

“How far are you?” 

“I’m getting there, I’ll be done before I get home, god.” he could hear Taichi rolling his eyes, even if he couldn’t actually hear it. “Is this about whatever Sora had to borrow my phone to listen to it earlier for?”

Ugh, of course she’d been with Taichi when talking about that earlier. They had a lot of classes together just now. Just his luck. 

“It’s none of your business. And how do you have it before she does? You’re Mr. Forgetful.” 

“Koushiro set up my phone to download them soon as they’re available. I just have to set up for preorder and I do so I don’t forget and get it late.” Taichi sounded so damn pleased about this. “So ha! I’m not going to be the last one to listen to it this time.” 

“You disgust me” he said dryly. Because what the hell else could he say? That was stupid and cute and this guy was going to be the death of him. He finally remembered what he’d come over here for instead of being distracted. “I’ll text you what we need from the store.”

“Why thank you.~ So helpful.~” 

“Go away, idiot.” 

“Yeah yeah, love you too. See you later.”

His heart always leapt to his throat when Taichi said things like that, so fucking casually and mmph, how he’d love it if they COULD be that casually flirty and romantic. Fuuuuuuck, stupid stupid Taichi and his stupid being cute and sometimes really considerate even when he was a total idiot.

Yamato texted the grocery list to him and went to flop on the couch again. Truly, he had a weird life and the universe was trying to punish him for something.

Soon as his face hit the cushions his phone went off again. He looked this time to see who it was first but answered soon as he saw it was Takeru. Try to be calm, try to be calm…

“Yamato? Are you ok? You usually don’t just call me randomly and not leave a message…” Takeru was sweet and good and actually concerned about his completely ridiculous brother and that was good.

“Yes just...having a very rough day dealing with myself.”

“Oh...you aren’t reading negative comments online again are you? The album’s brand new, you can’t beat yourself up about it already.” 

“No I - no. No that is not the problem.” he took a deep breath, “You definitely haven’t listened yet, have you?”

“Not all of it. I’ve had pretty steady classes all day. But I got through the first couple songs! Taichi texted me soon as his phone downloaded it so I could grab it!” Uggggggggggh.

“You two are part of a conspiracy of some kind aren’t you?” 

“We’re trying to be supportive friends and loved ones. Now what’s this about?” 

“Just...can you please do me a favor and skip the second to last song on the album? Please?”

Immediately Takeru’s tone went from light and casual to dry in a very good mimic of Yamato’s own way of speaking at points, “Yamato is this because its a sex song?”

Yamato felt like his skeleton was jumping out of his forehead with the flailing and screech noise he made at that question. “First of all how did you-”

“It’s called ‘Thirst for You’ and it’s marked as explicit. Take a guess.”

Could he just tear his face off form how hard he was dragging his hand down it? That felt like a good idea right now. What was he doing with his life. How was he supposed to function with this.

Takeru sighed audibly on the line. “Yamato, I’m an adult. I know what sex is. I’ve even had some, not that that’s your business. It’s not a big deal to me you wrote a sex song with your band. I’m pretty sure you have before too. What’s got you so bothered this time?” he was trying to be understanding even if, well, his brother WAS being unreasonable. 

Yamato knew he was being ridiculous but he couldn’t exactly HELP IT? This was just not easy at all.

“It’s not - it’s a very different kind of sex song. And it’s not something I necessarily wanted to share.”

“Did they put it on the album against your wishes?” here Takeru sounded actually seriously concerned.

“No I - I did agree. I like it as a song.” Yamato flopped into the couch cushions again and screamed, too muffled so only partly audible on the call. “I make bad life choices and I’m trying to minimize the damage, ok?”

“Well…..sorry. I’ll try not to over-analyze it or something. No judgement? But I probably am going to hear about it one way or another. Either because the others will talk about it or because Hikari is absolutely going to play it for me when I get off classes for the day.” 

“Yeah, I know, I just-wait she what?”

“She had a class break this morning and listened to it already. She’s been capslocking at me in texts all day to talk about it. So sorry, brother, other obligations first.~ You’ll just have to live with the consequences of your choices.~” he chuckled and then a background noise was audible, “Aaannnnnnnnnd my bus just got here so bye for now!” 

Yamato let the phone fall from his hand limply after the call shut off. Greeeeeeat. Not only did his brother know, his surrogate little sister, who was terrifyingly sharp-minded, was absolutely going to gossip about this. He didn’t want her listening to this song either. This was about her BROTHER! And even though he was sure they both would probably not linger on it as much as he was worrying, his anxiety did NOT want to let him have any peace about this.

Truly, what had he done to himself? He was going to be doomed when he had to deal with the whole group later...


	6. ~ Facing the Music ~

Yamato finally signed into the group chat in the evening. He’d locked himself in his room for most of the night and Taichi had taken the hint to not bother him - just poked his head in to say he was home and had the groceries and then closed it to go put them away. So this was Yamato’s first real interaction since his “discussion” with his brother earlier. He was not looking forward to it, at all.

What was he even supposed to say to everyone? Did half even know? Did they care about it at all? This was either going to be something or nothing. He was pondering what to say when the decision was very quickly taken from his hands. No sooner has his name been listed as signing in when a response in caps was made.

 **PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** WHO IS HE?!?!?!?!?!!??!!

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** Hello to you too, Mimi.

 **PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** shhhh this is no time for proper grammar and punctuation! WHOOOOOO ISSSSSS HEEEEEEEEEEEE?!?!? tellustellustellus!!!!

 **SoarinAway:** Mimi come on, let’s not pry.

Sora was a good kind soul. 

**Dr-Reliable:** What are we talking about again?

Oh no. No Jou, please, don’t get into this. 

**OnlyKnowledgeableOne:** Yamato put out his new album today. Did you not get a chance to listen to it?

Koushiro no don’t encourage this.

 **Dr-Reliable:** I’ve had a hot date with a diagram of the intestines so no.

 **Certified-Ex-Genius:** I’d be careful doing anything hot involving intestines, they don’t tend to like it

 **HipsterPANgel:** Ken don’t encourage him to make med school jokes. That’s not ok lol

Takeru please reign in your friends, really.

 **OnlyKnowledgeableOne:** I’ll send you a link, Jou.

Koushiro was so on top of this in the worst way possible. 

**Dr-Reliable:** I still don’t get how this relates to demanding who someone is?

 **PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** There’s a sex song on the album! About him wanting a guy to do him!!!! And I wanna know hwo it is!!

 **OnlyKnowledgeableOne:** *who.

 **PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** * i will kick you in the face if you correct me again koushiro. I will misspell what i want to.

 **HipsterPANgel:** #whipped

 **TheCatsMeow:** You realize you are all getting rather distracted and avoiding the topic of conversation, thereby giving him more time to think of an excuse, yes?

 **NoodlesNDoodles:** Uh oh, Hikari’s being devious again. Not fair.

Daisuke proceeded to post a series of flame emojis and a blushing emoji.

 **Certified-Ex-Genius:** Is there something you’re implying there?

 **TheCatsMeow:** He has a weakness for devious types. You of all people should know.~

 **HipsterPANgel:** brother interrogation! Back to it! Flirting later!

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** traitor.

 **PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** SO WHOOOOOOOOOO IS ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Ugh now he actually had to respond to that. He hoped they’d forget, he really did.

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** Nobody, ok? Excuse me for having fantasies.

 **OnlyKnowledgeableOne:** oh? I was under the impression it came across rather...accurate to life and certain lyrics seemed to indicate an actual situational appeal. Particularly the line about knowing the measurements of the person in question and having seen them even though you shouldn’t have.

 **Certified-Ex-Genius:** ‘big enough to make me scream, i know even if i shouldn’t have seen’ wasn’t it?

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** why do I talk to you people?

 **HipsterPANgel:** because you love us. :)

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** I’m really questioning that right now, little brother. 

**PrettyPinkFlowerPrincess:** tell ussssssss

 **BrilliantGirlAlert:** your lies will do you no good here

 **TheCatsMeow:** uh oh, Miyako’s joined the fray, you’re in trouble now

Really he loved and hated this sort of thing because on the one hand, he loved them normalizing stupid shit in his life but on the other hand this was MURDER ON HIS ALREADY ANXIOUS HEART. Why did he do these things to himself?

 **OrangeCarded:** so are we just going to ignore the entire rest of the album in favor of privacy invasion instead?

 **OrangeCarded:** like how about we mind our own fucking business if he doesnt wanna talk about it and maybe acknowledge he worked on some shit and put it out and it’s good? 

**OrangeCarded:** did not know it was talk about Yamato's dick o’clock, fuck

He didn’t know if he should be grateful to Taichi for that or not. On the one hand, he appreciated the vote of letting him keep his privacy, but on the other hand this was the one person he WANTED to know the opinion of. And he also wished he hadn’t phrased it that way. That was another reason to not be grateful. 

**HipsterPANgel:** We aren’t talking about his dick, if anything we’re talking about his ass given the context. :D

 **NoodlesNDoodles:** Takeru you’re just pleased cause it means you aren’t the only sub in the family

 **TheCatsMeow:** is it time to make bottoming jokes again? 

**Certified-Ex-Genius:** Please, it is always time to make bottoming jokes in this chat. 

**OnlyKnowledgeableOne:** I feel like I should sympathize but I don’t. 

The scream Yamato made was probably audible from wherever Taichi was in the apartment. Auuuuuugh these people.

 **NotSoLoneWolf:** i’m disowning u, all of you

He had to sign out. He just could NOT take more of this bullshit. Even if it was sometimes funny, right now he was just too many nerves. And what about Taichi? He’d seemed kind of...pissed off? That didn’t bode well. What the hell.

There was a knock at his door, followed by Taichi’s voice. “Try not to wake the neighbors, angstbucket.” 

“I’ll scream again just because you called me that.” 

“I’d make a joke about shutting you up but I think we’ve had enough of those for tonight. I made omelettes if you want food.” 

“For dinner?” he raised a brow, even if Taichi couldn’t see it.

“If you want something more complicated you can make it yourself. I made something I knew I could do. Now get out here.” 

He certainly sounded kind of grumbly, but not more so than that so maybe, maybe this could work out?


	7. ~ Spelling it Out ~

Heading out for nighttime omelettes, Yamato gave Taichi a wary look. Given their call earlier, Taichi had been in a fantastic mood. So him getting more grouchy now said something had happened. 

Yamato approached the counter in their small kitchen, taking a seat on one side of it. Their apartment didn’t exactly have ‘dining room’ space so it was either they ate at the island in the kitchen or they ate on the couch at the coffee table. And since Taichi was still up cleaning dishes at the sink on the island, it was better to sit here. Observe him more.

“So you got moody all-of-a-sudden.” Yamato commented, picking at his eggs before deciding he wasn’t quite ready for them.

“You got nosy too, funny how that works.” Taichi flicked water droplets at him. “Maybe your moods are just contagious.~”

“I’m anxious. You’re grouchy.” 

“What’re you anxious about?” Taichi looked at him a moment then shook it off. “People asking too many prying questions? Your bad life choices?”

“Something along those lines.” Yamato sighed and leaned on one hand, still picking at his eggs with the other. “What’d you think?”

“Of?” Taichi didn’t look at him.

He was going to punch him, he really was. “ _The album_. Jackass.” he flicked a bit of egg back at Taichi.

“It was fine. I’m not a music critic, you know that. I liked the one about getting new boots and getting your ass in gear.” 

Yamato snorted, “You would. Anyway, you’re being evasive. The most controversial, stressful part of this album, and you aren’t talking about it?”

Taichi looked at him pointedly, “As I recall, you were pretty determined to not talk about that, so why would I bring it up? Also eat your food, don’t play with it.”

Ok, fair point. Yamato made a grumbly noise and got up to put his omelette in the fridge, to give himself time to think, eventually just mumbling out, “Yeah but you aren’t everyone else.” He just could not get up an appetite right now.

“I never know if I should be pleased about that or insulted.” Taichi grinned and washed his hands off, finally having finished the pan he was washing. He didn’t question the abandoning of the eggs - sometimes Yamato didn’t get hungry till late. “See? I actually cleaned it fresh this time. No complaining about it.”

“Hopefully you actually did a good job of it…” there was no bite to Yamato’s words and he knew it. And he was ok with that, because it was Taichi and that’s how they were. 

“Well you can inspect my work then.” Taichi rolled his eyes and ruffled Yamato’s bangs as he walked past. 

“Ugh, at least dry your hands first.” he swatted Taichi’s hand away but without a lot of seriousness. “Anyway, I meant it...I do want your opinion.”

At that, Taichi visibly stiffened a bit and walked away to flop on the couch. “Yeah well, you won’t like it.”

“So tell me anyway.” seriously, why so evasive?

“Fine.I don’t like it. Happy?” Taichi didn’t look his way and just turned on the TV, browsing channels idly. And he could tell it was idle too - the way his eyes weren’t focused on it, the way he was flipping through them without enough time to actually see what was on seriously. This was just a gesture to distract himself.

Yamato’s first reaction was a twist in his gut that he quickly quelched. No, no that wasn’t just going to be it. Taichi was being evasive. Why didn’t he like it? That he had to know. 

“Ok, why then? Spill it.” Yamato walked after him, leaning over the back of the couch to smack his arm. “What’s your issue with the song?” 

“What do you care? You’re the one who spent like all day trying to get people to skip it - you even were all shady asking me if I’d even listened to it yet. What does it matter what I think of it?” Taichi shoved him back, still not looking up.

“Because I still made it! I still have feelings about things I created. And if there’s something wrong with it, I wanna know!”

“Why does there have to be something wrong with it? I just don’t like it!” Taichi turned around to properly shout back at him. “You made a song I didn’t like. Big fucking deal.” 

“It is a big deal! How fucking dare I value your opinion?” Yamato threw up his hands in annoyance. “You’re ridiculous! Why can’t you just tell me?”

“Why do you need my opinion on a song you wrote about how bad you want some guy to fuck you? I’m not the dick police! You’re a grown ass adult, want to fuck whoever you like and mysteriously release it for hundreds of people to fantasize to. You do you, man.” Taichi was on his feet, gesturing emphatically now, TV forgotten. “You were going out of your way to avoid talking to the others about it so why do you need to hound me for what I think?” 

“Because it’s not the same! Sure, I don’t want my little brother knowing about my love life, and I don’t want to get needled by Mimi, but it’s not the same as wanting to know what you think about something. You’re being super cagey and getting angry for no reason, so what is the actual fucking problem?” He stormed closer to Taichi, snarling right back at him. He could give as good as he got and damned if he wasn’t going to push back at Taichi being stupid like this.

Taichi stared at him and threw up his hands. “Un-fucking-believable. You are the weirdest guy about the stupidest things and I don’t get why you care so fucking much about it.” 

“Because you obviously have a lot more of an opinion than you’re giving and you seem to care about it too!” 

“You don’t need to know my opinion if I don’t want to share it with you, okay?!” Taichi snarled and they were already getting in each other’s personal space pretty badly. “I’m not getting in your face demanding you tell me who it is, so can you calm the fuck down about asking me why I don’t like it?”

Yamato flinched a bit at that one. Because he was right - Taichi had been more understanding than some about respecting his privacy and not asking. And he’d be the hardest person to tell that to anyway - because he wouldn’t exactly be able to deny it was about him. He could try, but he’d never succeed at that. But it twisted his gut feeling like Taichi didn’t like something that was ultimately a very personal thing meant for him - his opinion was the only one that DID matter! If he got like this over the sex song, he hated to see how he’d feel about the romantic ones. 

His eyes slid away from Taichi’s and he bit his lip, his stomach churning at those thoughts. Part of him had thought, deep down, that Taichi’s personality was at least a safety net in this. If he didn’t immediately get it was about him, at least it’d never do any harm - he’d probably just laugh it off and tease him about it. This was a vastly different reaction and it was kind of scary. 

For the amount people called him blockheaded - Yamato included - Taichi did have some grasp of when he’d struck a nerve. His posture softened immediately and he reached out to cup the sides of Yamato’s face, keeping him from fully turning away.

“Hey, no, don’t give me that look...by not looking at me...whatever.” Taichi huffed a quiet laugh and stroked Yamato’s cheeks where he could see the tears starting even if Yamato had barely noticed them himself. “I’m not going to apologize for not wanting to share, because I’m not sorry for that, but I am sorry I’ve upset you. If there’s a reason you need to know what I think that you’re not telling me, I need to know it to do anything about this. Otherwise I just gotta go off what you give me and make my best judgement.”

Yamato leaned into the touch. In some ways it hurt so much more but he couldn’t NOT do this. He loved when Taichi just up and did things because he cared, when he showed him this kind of tender affection that no one else would or even dared to. When he acted just so loving so effortlessly, and just hit all of the right notes to make Yamato absolutely ache for him. 

“Getting cuddly isn’t telling me your problem dipshit.” Taichi smirked and leaned in to bump their foreheads together and give him that devilish grin. “Why do you gotta be all cute when I’m mad at you?~”

“Fuck off, I’m not cute.” Yamato looked back at him long enough to shoot a dirty look and shove at his chest some. Still, meeting Taichi’s eyes made it so hard to even keep up a semblance of not looking at him or being angry. It hurt thinking Taichi would feel anything other than laughing off his sentiments, but he knew when he stopped panicking that anything seriously emotional? He’d absolutely be more gentle with. He gave a half smile, “Sorry. Just got...worked up in my own head.”

“There’s my sunshine.~” Taichi smiled and tangled his hands in Yamato’s hair, leaning in to press their foreheads together again and actually look into his face properly. “I am sorry I sent you on one of those. Even if I don’t get it.” 

“Yeah well...I’m sorry I pried. But you’re still an ass and I wish you would just tell me your issue with the song. I want to know what’s so bad about it...but I can accept if you won’t tell me.” He leaned into Taichi as well, pulling him into a half hug. 

“Pff - I didn’t say it was bad. I said I didn’t like it. You read too much into things.” Taichi untangled his hands after some minor hesitation and pulled Yamato into a proper hug. “It was a perfectly good song, hot as hell even. I just don’t like it.”

Wait, what? 

Yamato looked at him irritably, “What do you mean by that? It was good, but you don’t like it? What even.” He was not going to verbally acknowledge he’d said it was hot. Nope. Nope. Not going to acknowledge and dwell on Taichi saying that particular song was hot. Because they were absolutely too close for acknowledging that reaction to not get awkward.

“Can’t I just be annoyed at a good song? What do you care?” Taichi laughed and pulled away from him. Less angry than before but still being so evasive. 

“I want to know! Especially because you said it was - you said-” nope, nope stop thinking about the fact he said it was hot. That he found that attractive. Stop. Stoooooooooooop. 

Taichi’s eyes glimmered with mischief and he all but danced backing away from Yamato. “What, that it was hot? Yeah sorry, my gorgeous best friend wrote a sex song about wanting to get railed by some guy and it was attractive to hear?~” he was being flippant. He was being flippant about the fact he found it hot? What did that even-WHAT DID THAT MEAN? 

“No you - you - WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME?” Yamato stumbled forward after him. His brain seemed to be grasping at things but not connecting them, like everything in his brain had just exploded and wasn’t being cleaned up yet.

“I thought you wanted my opinion? You just yelled at me to tell you what I thought of it. It was apparently super imp……” Taichi’s eyes went from playful and mischievous to wide with shock to a very strange and confused look. “Wait you…...uh uh. That is not how…..no way.” And he was suddenly stepping Yamato’s direction again.

That change in expression was enough to send Yamato stepping back this time - back and forth, back and forth, an emotional dance he didn’t get but knew all the steps to. But he’d been at a different angle and his back was quickly against the wall. Not that he was afraid but he was suddenly very unsure. What did Taichi just catch onto? What was HE catching onto even?

This time when Taichi entered his personal space, there was a very different air to it and Yamato flattened himself against the wall a little. Not so much to escape but for support, especially as Taichi leaned in to look him in the eyes, taking hold of his chin very lightly to keep him from looking away, and asked him a question he’d been dreading.

“Yamato...you’re not getting fussy about this...because that song has something to do with me, are you?” 

The way he said it, Yamato’s eyes had already been fixating on Taichi’s lips to avoid looking him in the eye but now he was extra focused on them, watching him have to wet them to even get the words out. Fuck fuck fuck he was not supposed to be getting distracted like this. Or remembering lines where he’d very blatantly asked for just this sort of attention from Taichi. His hands, stiff at his sides till that moment, had seemingly been hit into an autopilot setting and they were absolutely betraying him as they reached up, by way of response, and clutched at Taichi’s shirt.

 _”Fuck, you are…”_ Taichi didn’t seem to know what to do with the realization, being hit with the knowledge someone essentially wrote an entire song about wanting you does that to a person. 

But then he started to laugh. A very quiet, very breathy laugh that was sending all the most wonderful _awful_ chills down Yamato’s spine and putting thoughts in his head. Very bad thoughts, thoughts that were exactly the kind that got him into this mess to begin with. Except that time he’d been alone and not pressed against a wall with the object of his affections making no effort to move any further away from him. 

He barely found his voice to speak, an attempt at defiance of his fate that was kind of pathetic in its own way, “Yeah? What’s it to you. So I wrote a - so I want you to - so fucking what?!” snapping at someone is way better when you don’t mess up your sentences and shiver with anticipation at what you said.

“So...I suddenly like the song a lot better now.~” Taichi mumbled, leaning into him again, lips very close to his own as he said, “Might even be my favorite song on the album now...ok second but who’s counting?~” 

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck he was close to him like that and this was going to go places wasn’t it? Actually what was he thinking - it had fucking BETTER go places at this point. Taichi did not get to get him all hot and bothered like this and then NOT do anything about it. Not after the day he’d had. 

“Are you going to do something about that or just stand there?” he grumbled.

Taichi grinned, “I think you gave me some very _specific_ instructions I need to work on following.” and he kissed him.

Oh he was doomed now wasn’t he?


	8. ~ And Then It's Real ~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS THE SMUT CHAPTER. And it's long. Woops.

Yamato was an extremely emotional person. He knew that. He’d accepted that - sort of. He also did a lot of hard work holding in some of the more intense things he felt. So having even a crack form in the wall of things he felt could lead to some pretty dramatic results when the dam finally broke. 

Which is why soon as his brain had gotten used to the idea of the fact Taichi was kissing him, he’d thrown himself into it at full force. One of his hands tangled in Taichi’s messy brown hair, his other hand still clutching his shirt, pulling him forward insistently. He needed this kiss like he needed air, if not more so, because Taichi was absolutely kissing him breathless. 

At least he wasn’t the only one completely losing himself to feeling. Sure, Taichi had maybe been in control for the first moment or two after kissing him but after that - after Yamato’d started responding to it - he had gotten just as wild and desperate. Pinning Yamato to the wall with his body, pushing into that insistent tug on his clothes, and stuck between eager to touch and unsure in some ways. He still cupped Yamato’s face with one hand but the other was moving along his chest, never fully settling in one spot for long. 

When the need for breathing did finally overtake, they broke apart, panting heavily and still leaning on each other. There was no way either of them could be fully supporting their weight at this point. Both because they didn’t feel like they could - and because neither wanted to be further away from the other just now. 

_“I can’t tell which I like better.”_ Taichi said softly, _”That look you’re giving me - the way it makes me feel I’ve never been loved as deeply as you can love me...or the way the entire rest of your expression says you want to be loved a very different way.~”_

“ _Oh shut up._ ” Yamato let go of Taichi’s shirt to thump his hand against his chest. _“We only just kissed, don’t bring emotions into it.”_

Taichi snorted, “ _Riiiiiiight. Right Yamato Ishida doing anything at all that doesn’t involve the absolute MOST in emotions.”_ he pressed teasing kisses to Yamato’s cheek. 

_”Fuck you. You’re the worst. I hate you._ ” he turned to catch his lips and tried to pepper kisses on Taichi’s face in response. 

“Oh, I’m so bad? Should I just get away from you then?~” he nipped at Yamato’s lower lip, giving him a few more kisses after for good measure.

“You’re an ass.” 

Yamato’s breath was coming back and with it, his voice, but more importantly, it meant he’d be able to get back to making out with Taichi soon. Leaning into the wall he looped his arms around Taichi’s neck properly and looked at him through his lashes. The fact he wasn’t fully standing was the only reason he wasn’t absolutely taller than Taichi right now and they both knew it and that made this even more fun. 

“Sheesh, first my thighs, now my ass, someone’s focused.~” Taichi’s hand slid down Yamato’s side and promptly pinched his ass to add some playful emphasis to his point.

Yamato jumped a little in surprise then moved to knee Taichi in the stomach - not hard, just enough to be able to bump him without having to undo his arms from around his neck. Ah the advantages of long legs. 

“You’re terrible.” 

However, he hadn’t been thinking about what if that had been a trick and he very suddenly found himself with something he’d pretty clearly requested but wasn’t expecting - Taichi took advantage of him moving to knee him and slid one of his thighs between Yamato’s legs. Now he was not only pinned to the wall but very much was being supported by one of Taichi’s legs and was being reminded just how much he wanted to get a better feel for them in more intimate circumstances. He just hadn’t really thought of how he’d react when he DID.

Yamato bit his lip, arching up and holding in a whimper. His hands slipped to clutch at the shoulders of Taichi’s shirt and fuck, he hadn’t even realized he’d been getting hard from the making out and now he was getting friction there and he was so doomed. So fucking doomed. 

Taichi moved closer to him, still keeping his leg positioned as it was to grind into Yamato but also taking advantage of their positions to start kissing at his neck a bit. This was so unfair and Taichi’s mouth on his throat was definitely not making this better and Yamato was trying so hard to keep all the sounds he wanted to make in, biting his lip far too hard.

It wasn’t till Taichi very firmly stopped, pulling back a bit to look at him that he realized he might be acting a little funny. Yamato released his lip and - well at least he didn’t taste blood this time. He had bitten through it before during a particularly good bout one night. But Taichi was looking at him strangely and he was starting to get self-conscious about it.

“What?!” he snapped, really wishing Taichi wouldn’t do something like stop and would get back to what had been such a nice feeling before.

“You - what are you even doing?” Taichi darted forward to grab him for a couple of quick kisses, speaking between them. “Stop biting your lip like that, you goof. You look like you’re gonna hurt yourself at this rate.” 

His whole face flushed red with embarrassment, “Shut up!” he actually did let go of Taichi again to push him some. “I don’t need you making fun of me when we’re trying to finally get somewhere.”

Taichi raised a brow, “I’m not making fun of you. I don’t get what you’re doing.” he moved his hand to stroke Yamato’s cheek gently. “I’ve seen someone bite their lip because they were enjoying things and...that doesn’t seem like what you’re doing. So what are you doing? Cause I don’t want this if you’re not actually into it.” 

Fuck he pushed all the right buttons for him, emotionally as well as physically. But then...of course he did. Taichi was this close to him for a reason. He let him in where he let nobody else that close. Feeling safe and able to trust somebody he cared about was important and Taichi did plenty to prove he was worth that trust. 

Yamato turned to press a kiss to the hand touching his face. “It’s just a bad habit, that’s all.” That’s all he really needed to say. Taichi got when he was vague like this for a reason, when there were parts that were unsaid that didn’t need to be. “I’m enjoying myself, I promise.”

“Good, cause if you weren’t, I’d have to work a lot harder.~” Taichi moved his hand to turn Yamato so he could steal him for a much firmer kiss and went back to properly leaning into making out with him, that wonderful friction starting up again.

Kissing him randomly and frequently seemed to be Taichi’s solution to getting Yamato to stop stifling his pleasure and it was working, slowly but surely. It started with a little whimper when Taichi’s hand slipped under his shirt and began to slide up his side. Then there was a soft keening sound on Taichi finding a spot on his neck to suck at just the right moment. And then...he hadn’t been able to hold in the all out moan when Taichi had shifted position and Yamato had found himself properly grinding against his best friend. 

Once the tide of sounds had started, there was no way he could stop it and Yamato was thrown right into having to arch and move in pleasure, moaning and whining and making the most pathetically needy sounds at every touch. And those sounds were interspersed with plenty of curse words and babbling that had been flooding his brain all day.

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck, yes - ah! - yes, like that!” he leaned in, arms wrapped around Taichi’s shoulders again as he clung to him and tried to find a way to get their bodies closer, moving it just so and he could feel the heat between them building so well!

“You’re going to drive me crazy talking like that.” Taichi’s voice had this note to it that it usually didn’t have, this minor edge of a growl, and it was definitely doing things for Yamato to hear. 

“Shut up, I just - _ahhhhh!_ \- want you. So so bad.” his own voice was doing things too - he’d been told when he was trying to TALK in bed it was pretty sexy. The other noises he made hadn’t been as popular but talking? That tended to be well received. It’s probably part of why the song had been popular - his voice did the thing there too. 

So it was probably no wonder why Taichi very suddenly pressed him back against the wall, staring into his eyes with a sort of wild look.

“Say that again.” 

Yamato blinked and then felt the smirk building on his lips. He brought his hands up to hold Taichi’s face, “What, that _I want you_?” It got a very visible shiver out of Taichi and so he had to continue, “That _I need you_?”

Taichi grunted and tried to move in closer to him, try to stifle Yamato’s words with his mouth but he was held firm just barely able to reach.

“How about that _I love you_?” he added that part softly, breathing the words against Taichi’s lips. 

“ _Especially that one._ ” Taichi agreed and pushed forward against his hold for that kiss - though Yamato was already moving his hands away to slide back into Taichi’s hair and pull him in closer. 

Being so thoroughly kissed was both a new and familiar experience for Yamato. He’d had plenty of makeouts before - plenty of people’s lips and tongues and all of that to taste. But there was something new and wonderful in the longing between them and the shared passion and the...effortless reciprocation of feeling. They had apparently just been ignoring or repressing feelings that were already there but now that they were in the open? It was impossible to ignore them or how it absolutely changed the playing field for how this sort of activity should feel. 

“You’re...absolutely ruining me for anyone else right now...hope you realize that.” Taichi panted against his lips between kisses. His arms had moved to supporting the small of Yamato’s back better so that they could keep up their grind, especially when Yamato wrapped his long legs around Taichi’s waist.

Yamato gave a soft ‘hmm’ of agreement, falling right back into kisses inarticulately. It was a sentiment he definitely shared even if his brain was a lot more focused on getting Taichi’s tongue in his mouth again and how soon that could be accomplished with the whole breathing thing.

The only thing that could really stop this train of feelings and kissing and enjoying each other was the very insistent heat pooling in Yamato’s belly that was really not going to end well with him fully dressed. He gave an unhappy grumble and leaned his face into Taichi’s neck to breathe. 

_“I’m...getting close. And I’m really not ready for us to be done and I really just want you to-”_

Taichi cut him off with a kiss to his temple, his own breathing just as heavy. “ _Fuck. Yeah. Wasn’t thinking.”_ he agreed. _”Bedroom?_ ”

“ _Yes please.”_

It took them a little coordination but that was honestly nothing new, and soon enough they’d tipped back into a standing position so Taichi could carry them to the bedroom, Yamato with his legs still around Taichi’s waist and arms around his shoulders again. He couldn’t help but feel a little giddy, on top of the excited eager needy feelings. This was their room, and they were going to actually share it together for more than just a cuddle they were both denying how serious they were about.

“And down you go.” Taichi tossed him onto the bed in the least sexy way possible, laughing as he did. 

Yamato landed on the bed with an ‘oof!’ and gave Taichi a dirty look. “I’ll get you for tha-.” his entire train of thought came to a screeching halt as his eyes found Taichi pulling off his shirt and was left mesmerized just slowly watching more and more skin being revealed. Which was stupid - he’d absolutely seen Taichi shirtless before and didn’t care as much about it but the context and the implication that he was absolutely going to get to touch all of that and kiss it even..that was definitely appealing.

Eventually he got his voice back enough to choke out words, “I thought we were going to - to slow down for a minute here?” he was breathless again and trying to not think about the eager feelings of desire that were shooting straight to his dick. That was not an ok way to get him to calm down and not lose it early.

Taichi looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. “Sorry, you keep tugging my shirt and it’s getting hard to move my arms. Besides, you’ve seen me with it off before, loser.” he took a seat on the end of the bed and flopped back so they could look at each other more easily. “You’ve seen _a lot_ more of me than that, even.” 

“And yet I still find you attractive somehow.” Yamato agreed like it was a completely bizarre concept. He smirked and rolled over to his side so he could actually face Taichi as they talked and give them time to actually calm down so they could do this right.

Taichi looked at him distantly and reached up to toy with his bangs again.

“You just like my bangs a lot, don’t you?”

“Of course I do. They’re cute and spikey and I’m seeing if I can make them not look intentional and they never do.” Taichi tangled his fingers properly into Yamato’s hair then and stroked his thumb along his temple. 

Yamato closed his eyes and relaxed against the bed, letting him just do that. “You get touchy with me so easy.” 

“You like it.” Taichi snorted. 

Yamato didn’t bother opening his eyes to roll them. “Of course I do, dumbass, or I wouldn’t let you do it.” He smiled just the same. 

“I know that.” Taichi’s laugh was soft and closer than it had been before so Yamato had to open his eyes, just a bit to see him nearer and leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. 

“You make it easier to touch you back.” Yamato finally said, reaching up to lazily wrap his arms around Taichi’s now bare shoulders and pull him closer to nuzzle into. It was hard to not just jump back into getting naughty with him but the emotional stuff did help keep him grounded.

Taichi pressed more kisses to his face and settled closer to him. “Oh I know, your best friend being super affectionate is a great excuse to let yourself get cuddly with someone.~” 

“Best friend?” Yamato glanced up at him then, the feelings in his stomach trying to twist their way back into prominence. 

“Boyfriend? Lover? Guy I live with and hardcore want to sleep with?~” 

Taichi laughed as Yamato hit him in the chest for his insolence. He pushed back a bit and soon they were half wrestling against the bed and Taichi, being a horrible unfair person that he was, decided to tickle Yamato.

“EEP! HEY NO!” he kicked his legs and flailed, laughter overtaking him and he had to cling to Taichi to stifle it, grateful as hell that ‘no’ was at least enough to stop a tickle attack. Even if he hadn’t minded it that much, they tended to get very overwhelming very fast.

They were flopped together, laughing for a good few minutes before finally looking at each other, out of breathe again...and that spark seemed to drift right back between them. Yamato leaned in this time to kiss Taichi, pulling him on top to just lay in bed together and explore each other’s mouths as thoroughly as possible. 

Taichi’s hand found its way under Yamato’s shirt again and with a shiver at the contact, Yamato pulled back to start trying to get it off. It wasn’t fair he got to have his hands on Taichi’s chest but couldn’t feel more of these touches on his own. 

When it was finally off, Taichi let out an appreciative whistle and pulled Yamato against him once more. “Who let you be so gorgeous?~” he pressed a few kisses to his jaw and neck. 

“Oh shut up. You’re terrible at compliments.” Yamato pinched his cheeks to try and show some sort of fight and not just melt into blushing and letting himself be fawned over. He was a grown ass adult who had had plenty of sexual partners before, he did not get swoony over his best friend saying cute shit.

“I’m good enough at them for you it seems.~” Taichi swooped in to steal a proper kiss from him, arms around Yamato’s middle to hold him close all the same. 

“You’re useless in bed aren’t you? Just all kisses and no substance.” Yamato said entirely teasing him. Like he wasn’t trying to get more of those kisses between every couple of words. 

“What do you want for substance? You barely managed to keep talking at me getting my shirt off. Are you going to survive seeing me naked?~” Taichi had started down his neck again and was starting to actually get close enough to getting kisses on Yamato’s collarbone. 

Oh no. That was not somewhere he’d been ready for kisses. He rather LIKED being kissed there so this left him squirming and panting again. It was especially bad because Taichi was clearly listening for this sort of reaction and wasn’t letting up when he did get Yamato to this state. Sure, it shut him up, but at what cost?

Getting Taichi’s hands and mouth on his chest was the best and worst plan of all time, seriously. He arched into the attention eagerly, but it was quickly bringing him back to that state of needy and hot and absolutely not going to last. Why did it have to be the time he got to get physical with the guy he’d been longing for, that was when his body forgot how to have any sort of stamina or be able to handle waiting? Oh right. _Emotions_. Ugh.

“ _Nice as this is...can we...speed this up?”_ Yamato panted, tugging at a section of Taichi’s hair to get him to actually look up again.

“Spoilsport.~” Taichi stuck his tongue out at Yamato but sat back anyway to look at him proper. “So guess one of us actually has to get out of their clothes if we’re going somewhere with this, huh?” 

He stood with a shrug and Yamato sat up after to try and move to undress as well. Because if he didn’t, he was going to watch Taichi strip. And he was pretty sure he’d never make it through that without getting too excited. So better just get them both naked as fast as possible and worry about the showiness some other time.

Turning back once his pants were safely off, Yamato got to have his turn at a smirk because Taichi was definitely watching him. It was visible from his posture to his expression and how he’d just sort of frozen. That and the fact he was visibly hard, which was nice too.

“See something you like?” 

That was enough to bring him back to reality. “Yeah, yeah I do.” And he all but pounced Yamato to the bed.

Taichi’s lips found Yamato’s again and they kissed roughly, bodies grinding together as they did. If it’d been good earlier, it was a thousand times better now that they had nothing to keep them apart. Yamato found himself tugging on Taichi’s lower lip with his teeth and lightly scraping his nails along his shoulders, falling into these sensations and feeling Taichi doing the same.

Spending time just lost in each other was just going to have to be a part of sex Yamato just got used to, apparently - at least, if he wanted to keep having it with Taichi. Because they seemed to do a lot of just enjoying fooling around and _feeling_ each other. Maybe it was just something about the wait that made even the littlest things worth it, something to indulge in and savor. Still there were things to be done - namely him.

“We’re really going to have to figure out better pacing for this in future.” Yamato panted.

“How many years did we take to even get to making out? We’ve just got pacing issues to begin with,” Taichi pointed out, “besides, when else am I going to get the chance to learn what you like?~” 

“Probably next time?!” Yamato gave him an indignant look that he couldn’t hold for long - for one thing because he wasn’t actually upset but for another because Taichi’d picked that moment to move his hips _just right_. And how was he expected to do anything other than throw his head back and cry out with pleasure at that?

“Oh...so we’re...agreeing to...a next time?~” he’d have been waaay more pissed off at Taichi’s smug tone if it weren’t broken by his own panting and moans. 

“Not if...we don’t...finish this one...first…” Yamato whined, shoving Taichi lightly.

“Oh fine fine.” Taichi gave him a quick peck on the lips then sat up, and leaned over to look into the drawer on the nightstand. 

Yamato immediately tensed up, looking at him with wide eyes, “What are you doing?” _He_ knew what was in that drawer but since when did Taichi know?

Taichi looked at him and raised a brow before realizing. “What, do you want me to act surprised and play like I just discovered where you keep condoms and lube? Oh no, how shocking.~” Taichi put his hands to his cheeks and feigned being scandalized. “Yamato, I am innocent person who didn’t know you did the horrible sex thing. I have never heard such things or knew you did them, definitely not enough to write songs about doing them.~” 

Watching Taichi fool around like this was funny enough normally but adding in the fact he was naked and kneeling between Yamato’s legs right then just made it so much worse. So of course, Yamato burst out laughing in his face. 

“You’re an ass!” he wheezed, reaching up to shove Taichi again. 

“You keep pushing me and I’m going to fall off the bed, jackass.” he abandoned his quest for a moment to lean back in and cup Yamato’s face, pressing several small kisses all over his cheeks, which did nothing to stop him laughing.

Yamato threw his arms around Taichi’s shoulders again, pulling him in close and turning to return the barrage of little kisses. 

“This isn’t helping your whole ‘get a move on fucking me’ demands.~” Taichi pointed out but made no moves to break his hold, instead just stealing another proper kiss.

“Shut up, I’ll let you go again, it’s just...weird,” Yamato glanced away, “I’m still getting used to connecting you to that part of my life.” 

“Which part?” Taichi let up on kisses long enough to look at him, serious for a moment. 

“This part.” Yamato had to release his hold on Taichi’s shoulders just to gesture emphatically at their positions and state of undress. “You were pretty high on the ‘people I’m never going to be able to be with even if I want to’ list and I wanted to keep my love life separate from what we have together.” 

Taichi’s gaze softened and he kissed Yamato firmly before he spoke, “Going to be ok?”

He took a few deep breaths and laid back a bit. Well, not like they were going to progress any if he didn’t relax some. 

“Not if you don’t get your ass in gear.” he finally said smirking up at Taichi.

“Whatever his highness demands.~” Taichi got back to his quest through the drawer to see what Yamato had in the way of supplies. He narrated his quest - both to torment Yamato and to normalize it a bit. To make this seem more real. “Let’s see here...well somebody’s picky and prepared. Variety packs, Yamato? Are these for partners too or does your dick change sizes that dramatically?” 

Yamato rolled his eyes, “You’re an idiot. Yes they’re for whoever I’m with. Just in case somebody wants to claim they don’t have any. Or in case Suzu runs out.”

“Sure and it’s definitely not just because you hate Jou’s taste in condoms even when you support him making sure others have them.~” Taichi said quirking a devilish smirk at him, “Ooh, bubblegum flavored? You rebel.~”

“Oh shut up, that was a sample one.” 

“I know, you don’t even like bubblegum. And no one’s letting you put a pepper flavored condom on them.~” 

Yamato blanched at that, “That sounds disgusting! And painful!” he smacked Taichi’s chest again.

This time, as he’d been warned, the hit actually started unbalancing him and Yamato had to scramble to keep Taichi from falling off the bed. Instead he pulled him back against him and so once more they were flush against each other, looking at bit surprised and breathless the both of them.

“Long time no see.” Taichi said with a wry smile, holding up the condom he’d picked out in one hand. “I think this may be your stop, Yamato, cause you’re sure eager to get off.~” 

“Your puns are awful and I hate you.” Yamato made a face but in truth, he loved the stupid wordplay in puns and Taichi had learned that about him long ago, and used it way too often for either of their own good. “I could have just let you fall off the bed you know.”

“I have managed to crack my head into something and not kill the mood in bed before, but I’d rather not repeat that experience.” Taichi said that offhandedly while setting aside the condom and actually pulling out the bottle of lube from the drawer to get things started.

Yamato’s eyes went wide, “You what? How? WHY.” That was dangerous, what was he even thinking?

“Oh, is it story time? Yamato, I didn’t know you cared.” Taichi gave a wild grin then ducked in to give him a quick peck on the lips, pushing Yamato to relax back against the pillows. 

Lying back as he was urged, Yamato rolled his eyes, “Of course I care, what are you off doing stupid stuff like that for?” 

“Dunno, I was drunk at the time.” Taichi suggested, settling against him on the bed and his left hand trailing lazily over Yamato’s shoulder, a soft and teasing sensation to go with his words.

“Drunk too? This is getting better and better. Not.” 

“Do you want to hear the story or not?” Taichi asked him, before smiling and continuing anyway. “So this was sometime around when we started college. I was into this chick I knew from my writing class. She had some sort of house party with her friends that went out of control.”

Yamato gasped and clutched at Taichi’s arm when he felt the first finger enter him. The soft touches from his other hand turned into gently massaging his shoulder and arm to try and get him to relax and loosen his grip.

“So writing class chick was way more obnoxious outside of class-”

“-someone YOU would find obnoxious?” Yamato gasped, biting his lip again and trying to relax. The sensation was something he’d felt before but he hadn’t exactly had anyone recently and...well this was with Taichi so really, everything was new in unexpected ways.

“Yeah, there are people besides you I find obnoxious.~” Taichi said teasingly, his voice soft. He leaned in to press kisses to Yamato’s neck and jaw, trying to ease him with that as well as his touches and words.

Focusing on Taichi talking helped and Yamato leaned into him, relaxing again and letting him continue prepping him - and telling this story that was keeping his mind off of it. He nodded quietly to let him know it was safe.

“Anyway yeah, not my kind of person and her friends weren’t my kinda people either. An ok party but overall sorta lame. However, she had a bestie who was equally as not interested the other friends or this party so we snagged some of the drinks and snacks and went off to play video games in a guest room.” 

“How did - how did - ah! - how did video games with someone’s friend lead to cracking your head during sex?”

“Well the bestie and I snagged a lot of drinks? It was a pretty wild party, there was a ton to go around so there was plenty to take. And somewhere after playing and drinking and goofing around for a long while we decided to get frisky and since neither of us knew the house well we didn’t have a good idea of the layout of the room. So we were fumbling about in this already dim room - cause we’re idiots playing video games in the dark, right? So when the making out and stripping happens, only light is coming from the dim TV screen and so we’re fumbling about and we kinda trip onto the bed and there was a lamp we didn’t notice and-”

“You knocked over a lamp having sex at someone else’s house with a stranger?” Yamato was panting but at least his exasperation with Taichi’s antics took his mind off of everything else. Ok, the tender touches and kisses were helping with that too still, but mostly the exasperation.

“I make bad decisions on a regular basis when sober and with you around to yell at me - do you think my decision-making somehow gets better without being nagged by a hot blond?” 

“So did you break the lamp?” Yamato blushed at the suggestion of being hot but really he shouldn’t at this point but still!!!

“No, I just tripped over the cord to it and knocked the lamp over and I hit my head on the base of it. I remember swearing but I was drunk enough to not think about it so not really feel it - but not so drunk I couldn’t make sex happen so it was a kind of weird middle ground. And so we did this and are pretty much trying to find our way back into our clothes after when someone else ends up stumbling into the room because they apparently also had the idea that ‘guest room sex’ is a great plan at this party. But them running into it occupied gets attention and so somehow the confusion attracts the host who turns on the light.”

“So suddenly in the light, it’s me, the best friend, the host, the host’s boyfriend, and someone else from the party - all very confused in this main room at various states of sobriety. This is when I discover I was trying to put my pants on backwards. This is also when the host discovers her boyfriend was absolutely trying to get it on with another guest. And then there’s a scream because all at once, everyone else realizes I’m bleeding.”

Yamato actually had to half sit up and give him a wide-eyed stare. “What.” 

“So that’s the story of how I got to explain to my coach on Monday, that I missed practice Saturday because I got concussed at a house party the night before and was in the hospital.” 

“You tell terrible stories.” Yamato flopped back again and then yelped in surprise as Taichi moved his fingers - since when had there been more than one in him? - and managed to startle Yamato with the motion.

“Sorry, not all of us can snort cocaine off a groupie’s ankles or whatever you rocker types get up to.” 

That actually got another laugh from Yamato, “Ankles? Really?” 

“It’s the hot new tragedy sweeping our nation, Yamato.” Taichi slowed his fingers because he was laughing as well now and not focusing on what he was doing would be a bad time all around.

“I guess it’s about as believable as things people actually do. I’ve heard people drink shots out of stripper’s belly buttons so…” Yamato made a vague gesture, settling against Taichi again. 

However, he quickly noticed Taichi made a face at that, almost a wince, and shook his head silently. Wait…

“Have you actually done that?” Yamato shot him a look. That didn’t exactly seem Taichi’s cup of tea. 

“Nooooo…...I mean it wasn’t a stripper? Oooor just a shot?” 

Yamato made a dramatic show of flopping back and throwing an arm across his face. “Well I made it this far into this nonsense with you telling me a stupid story. Better give me another if I’m going to make it to you actually fucking me.” 

“You’re doing so well though.~” Taichi gave him another quick kiss before he sighed and had to continue what he’d started, “So this was at a bachelor party for one of my teammates. I gave at least one person a black eye for suggesting they should have hired my sister should have been involved, so already, this was a pretty strange sorta party. Definitely a lot of alcohol involved in this story too.”

“You can’t - ah! Careful there! - drink alcohol out of a stripper’s navel without alcohol being involved.” Yamato had cut himself off briefly at a jolt of pain on the third finger being added. 

Taichi slowed his fingers and kissed him tenderly, letting him relax before he made any motion to continue. When he did, it was back to his story to keep Yamato focused on it. 

“Well see, the best man considered himself a kind of creative thinker so decided to go for a unique experience for the bachelor party. So we were at this privately booked room at some club none of us had been to and I don’t even remember the location of other than it was dark, the couches were black leather or satin or something, something fancy, and there were neon blue lights as the only lighting. And this was a place you like ate off a naked - or mostly naked - chick’s body. I don’t know if this is something they normally offer or something arranged just for the party, but I remember deciding it was fucking weird.”

“You still tried it though.”

“I did say this was a party with my teammates.” he pointed out, “I wasn’t getting out of doing dumb shit on a dare or because it’s what everyone was doing. So yes, I tried eating off someone’s abdomen and I did try the shot out of the navel neither of which was that appealing but my tastebuds were also just numb because of whatever hella things we were drinking. I left that party somewhere between that and karaoke, with punching happening somewhere along the way. And that is all I remember after I left and remembered what lights that aren’t neon blue look like and I woke up the next day on our couch with you beating me with a pillow.” 

This got another laugh out of Yamato, “I remember that - I came out for breakfast and you were unconscious with your face in the couch cushions and your legs apart but still almost trying to stand. You were in a suit and I didn’t get why or why your ass was in the air but I hadn’t had coffee yet.” 

“And your decision based on my butt in the air in a suit is to beat me up with a pillow?” Taichi snorted and held steady to let Yamato finish laughing. 

“It’s a nice butt but that was a shitty suit and you looked completely stupid and I wanted you to stop standing around like a weird statue so I could sit on the couch and it wouldn’t be weird!” 

“So beating your hungover boyfriend was the solution, wow how nice of you.” Taichi gave him a few chin kisses, “Feeling ok?” 

“You weren’t my boyfriend yet, jackass.” Yamato grumbled, “And yeah. I think we’re good to go.” 

Taichi nodded, sliding his fingers out and sat up to reposition them a little. “For the record, I don’t know if it was the ‘eating or taking a shot off someone’ itself that was weird, or just the whole atmosphere and the company.” 

“Sounds like it. There’s a difference between that and licking whipped cream or chocolate sauce off of your lover in private.” Yamato shifted his legs to give Taichi a bit better access and looked up at him with interest.

“Speaking from experience?” Taichi smirked at him. He picked up the condom he’d selected earlier and opened the wrapper. 

“Perhaps,” was all Yamato would tell him. However, he did reach forward to take the condom from his hands, “I will say I have experience with this part...and it tends to be more fun with...help…” his eyelids dropped a little and he found himself looking at Taichi partly through his lashes, hoping that and his tone conveyed it right. 

“I’m not opposed to help...or just to you touching me.~” Taichi licked his lips and gave Yamato a fond grin. 

“I sure hope you’re not opposed to that because I _like_ touching you.” Yamato reached forward to grasp Taichi’s cock and work on actually helping him get the condom on.

Somehow, this got an amused chuckle from Taichi, alongside the obvious blushing and lip biting. 

“Something funny?” Yamato raised a brow at him once more.

“Nothing. You’re adorable.” he smiled brightly and reached out to stroke Yamato’s cheek with the back of his hand. Using the other he helped the whole ‘condom on’ process - three hands really were good in a situation like this.

Yamato looked away again but blushed, quirking a half smile. “Ok, whatever you say. You’re the one laughing while I touch your dick.” he took up the bottle of lube to pour some out for this - another reason he was so choosy about his brands of things.

“You were also giving me the flirtiest look when you offered then just looking so damn serious when you were actually doing things, it was cute.”

“You’re an ass.” as he’d finished his task, Yamato’s hands were now free again to smack Taichi in the chest.

“When you said you wanted to keep touching me, I really was hoping it’d be in a way besides all the smacks!~” not that he meant that seriously - the two of them touching each other or play hitting was how they showed affection when they were feeling more rough and tumble. Taichi was more just continuing to tease and play while they continued - especially as he was now moving again.

Yamato gave Taichi his best blank look, “Well when you said you were going to fuck me, I thought you were actually going to do it too. Guess we both have some slightly incorrect-MMMMM!” that was about all he was capable of saying before his whole body was rocked with sensation. Taichi’d let him get distracted talking and being dramatic, and took that moment to enter him. 

Lying back against the bed and clutching the sheets some, Yamato trembled and panted a bit, trying to center himself and get used to the feeling. Taichi was taking the actual entry very slowly - which was good - but it was still an overall thing he had to get used to and not reacting was something Yamato couldn’t really do. He could feel Taichi shifting over him a bit, smiled weakly as he felt Taichi kissing away the start of tears forming. It wasn’t necessarily from pain, he could also just get teary from emotion and sensation and there was a lot of both of those in this.

“ _Take it easy. Just relax, Yamato._ ” Taichi’s voice was breathless and it sounded both a million miles away and so very close all at once. He was making his own soft gasps and moans of pleasure at the sensations but trying to stifle them a little to talk Yamato through the adjustment portion of things.

Fuck. It was just hitting him all at once now. Not just how good this was already starting to feel, but also...this was with _Taichi_. His best friend - the guy he’d spent several long years deeply in love with. Someone he trusted completely and...fuck fuck fuck, this was possibly the first time of many. However many they wanted. He was going to get to _be with_ this person he loved, and trusted and cared about, and this was just a small piece of that but it was already a good piece of it. He found himself shaking a little and desperately pulling Taichi closer to him, holding on tight and burying his face in his shoulder. 

This change in mood was a little concerning for Taichi so he paused any other motions, carefully rubbing Yamato’s back and holding him tight instead. “ _Hey, are you ok? Are you hurting or are you just having a lot of feelings?”_ He pressed kisses to the top of Yamato’s head and tried to let him get an actual answer out.

“ _Sorry. Just very...very overwhelmed with emotions. This feels good...really really good.”_ he finally got the words to form right. Still clinging but relaxing enough to speak and stop shaking.

“ _Ok well have whatever emotions you need to, but stop me if you want or need me to stop, ok?”_ The actual genuine care and concern was helping, but so did Taichi’s special brand of humor. “ _Are you this wobbly with everyone you bang or is it just for me?~”_

Yamato recovered himself enough at that to relax his grip and instead move his hands to cup Taichi’s face, pulling back so they were looking into each other’s eyes. Instead of smacking him or pushing him away, he decided to get back at him for his teasing with serious intense emotion instead. 

“ _Like this? Only ever for you. You don’t get to be with someone you love like this for the first time often.”_

Taichi’s eyes visibly widened at that, and he had to swallow hard, staring at Yamato. For a second, it was worrying how quiet he was being, if that was the wrong move. And then he smiled…

“ _Damn...guess I was wrong...I thought I couldn’t fall more in love with you than I already am…”_ the words fell from his lips with such reverence, but so easily too, like he didn’t have to think about them at all before they came out. 

How effortlessly Taichi met the intensity of Yamato’s feeling in his own way was sweeping Yamato up in more emotions and he had to all but dive into the kiss Taichi was leaning in for. It was long and deep and the kind of passionate kiss that there were only certain ways to really appropriately break. One way was usually letting it run its course and leaving them both just breathless and panting…

The other way to properly break a kiss like that was what Taichi chose. Moving his hips at just the right moment to send pleasurable shocks through them both, the kiss had to break so they both could let out the aching, needy moans and grab at each other. Because fuck fuck fuck that part also felt really nice and they definitely could get back to that too. 

The feeling was definitely a sign Yamato was comfortable enough that they could get properly into it now, and he gave Taichi a light shove to indicate as much. Sure, he could have gone with another gentle touch and maybe begged or something, but that sort of thing was reserved for other lovers who didn’t get what he meant just from that. Which clearly Taichi did get it, immediately starting to slowly pull out then thrusting back in just the right way to get Yamato to arch and moan. 

Taichi leaned his face against Yamato’s collarbone, laughing breathlessly between noises of pleasure as he moved his hips. “ _You’re wonderful.”_

“ _You have me fucking...writhing beneath you and...that’s the best you come up with?”_ not that it was easy to think of particularly good compliments - or insults - while in this state of pleasure. But trust them to not know how to shut up. 

“ _You got your chance to be an emotional mess, let me have mine.”_ Taichi was still laughing some and just to be a jerk, took the chance to bite a spot on Yamato’s collarbone he’d noted earlier as a favorite. A bite he made right on a thrust back in.

“ _Oh please do go on and-AHH!!!!! Taichi! Yessssssss!”_ Yamato was arching again and he couldn’t stop himself from moving one of his hands into Taichi’s hair, a desperate attempt to keep him there. The nails on Yamato’s other hand dragged down Taichi’s back, a needy motion he wasn’t thinking much about.

“ _What was that? I should stop?~”_ Taichi all but purred the words into his skin and gave another quiet huffy laugh at the way the hand in his hair tightened a little and pushed him back down for emphasis. He pulled out almost all the way this time and stayed that way just to torment his love a bit.

Yamato let out a low growl - the best one he could manage between needy moans and soft whimpers of pleasure. “ _Taichi I swear if you stop right now I’m going to-AaaAAAAAAAAAAAaaaHH!”_ He’d have thought about how much he hated Taichi getting good at surprising him like this, but he was a little busy seeing stars after that last thrust, angled just right to hit a spot deep inside and drive him wild.

With how things were getting, the talking started to drop off in favor of just cries of pleasure and whimpering each other’s name, along with other non-talking uses of their mouths. They’d found a pace and a rhythm that worked and neither could be bothered with anything other than just feeling it and riding this high of pleasure. 

This time when he got close, there was nothing to stop them from continuing to push over the edge. Yamato pulled Taichi to him for a deep kiss, moving his hips to meet Taichi’s thrusts and get that extra push between them. That seemed to get the message across just fine and Taichi picked up the pace for the final stretch.

The pleasure and emotion of it were overwhelming and Yamato found himself crying out Taichi’s name as he came, completely losing himself to it, and to the absolute wonder of hearing his own name echoed on his love’s lips as he felt Taichi falling over the edge with him. His brain was in a completely non-functioning state, feelings and thoughts flying through at light speed, and the only one he could even mildly hold onto for long was that this was _nothing_ like he’d imagined or wanted. It was _so much fucking better_.

For a little while, it was like floating and there was nothing in the world but them, nothing but each other to hold onto. Yamato was at first a little annoyed at himself for such a cliched description of such a feeling but then...he’d legitimately been floating and been the only one in the world besides Taichi before so knew damn well those were pretty damn good summaries of his feelings so fuck you, inner cynic! Instead of arguing with himself more, Yamato instead just worked on trying to get his eyes open to look at Taichi beside him.

When he did get to look at him, Taichi was collapsed against the bed and looking hazy and sleepy and with this fond smile on his face that put sunsets to shame. He was leaning on his arm and looking at Yamato with partly closed brown eyes with still wide pupils. His other hand moved to stroke idly over Yamato’s face and for a few moments it wasn’t clear why till he realized the wet on his cheeks - oh. He was crying again. 

_“I’m hoping those are happy tears._ ” Taichi mumbled into his arm, still smiling though.

“ _Didn’t know I was even crying again, so yeah.”_ Yamato’s voice was a little hoarse and he croaked the answer out. Still, he wasn’t that surprised - when he got too emotional crying was ridiculously easy, and when with someone he trusted this much? No reason not to just let it out. 

Taichi laughed soundlessly, and stroked his cheek some more, even when there were no more tears to wipe away. Eventually, he seemed to have the energy to move again and leaned in to give Yamato a quick kiss before trying to get up. 

“ _Not going to cuddle with me?_ ” Yamato asked softly, though it was mostly in jest. Nothing in Taichi’s posture or mannerisms showed a disinclination towards them staying close and being tender right now, so he was probably up for a different reason. 

“Of course I am. I just know better than to not get cleaned up after sex. Especially when my partner’s a picky fuck like you.” Taichi headed out of the room and eventually returned, tossing a warm towel at Yamato. 

“ _Calls me a picky fuck and throws things at me. You’re so kind to your lovers._ ” Yamato sat up a bit to take advantage of the towel just the same. 

“Like you wouldn’t have been pissed off once you got over the sex high and felt gross.” Taichi helped him get cleaned off then tossed the towel to the laundry hamper.

Yamato gave a small smile and didn’t say anything, because he knew damn well Taichi was right but he wasn’t going to admit that. Instead, he just trailed a hand lazily along Taichi’s back, waiting for him to settle back in for those promised cuddles. However, as he did, his fingers ran across the newly washed scratches on his back - which had probably been a bit worse looking before Taichi had left, but he hadn’t been awake enough to notice. 

“Oh you’re...sorry.” that sort of thing could send him crashing back to reality a little faster than he’d like. He hadn’t really been thinking about leaving scratches on Taichi at the time but now he could see them…

Taichi glanced back at him and raised a brow. “For what?” he asked and then huffed a little laugh, turning and pulling Yamato to him. “If I had a problem with you getting a little rough with me, I’d have told you to stop it at the time.” he pressed a few gentle kisses to Yamato’s neck and collar, “Not like you haven’t got some bites to show now.”

“I like a little biting. You already knew that.” apart Taichi having caught him with marks from it before, he’d also said so in the song that started all of this. “I didn’t ask if you were ok with that.”

“Well I am. It’s going to be weird to explain in the locker room but fuck do I care?” Taichi settled in against him, letting Yamato get snuggled up as he felt most comfortable. “Like I said, if it were an issue, I’d have said something. I trust you.” 

Yamato accepted defeat on the subject and stopped worrying about it, instead cuddling up to Taichi to relax properly now, “I trust you too.” he agreed, then after a moment, leaned up to peck his cheek, “Love you.”

“Never going to get tired of hearing that. Love you too, Yamato.” he turned to catch the little kiss and settled down with him to rest. 

“You’re going to run out of dumb stories to tell me when we’re having sex, I hope you realize that.”

“You underestimate how much stupid stuff I do.”

“Point…” Yamato yawned and closed his eyes, enjoying the new comfort being naked and post-sex added to their already perfectly nice nightly cuddles. Maybe this could work out okay...he’d have to think about it tomorrow.


	9. ~ The Show Goes On ~

Yamato clattered into their practice hall with his arms around his bag, which was stuffed full today. His clothes were a bit in disarray and his hair was actually looking more fooled around with than usual.

“Whoa, you’re the late one for a change! What happened?” Keiji was sitting on the floor messing with some of the cords to the amp. 

“Are you alright?” Haru asked, trying to sound more sympathetic than amused.

Yamato huffed a bit, “Sorry. I...had trouble getting out of the apartment on time.”

“You? Sleeping in on a weekend? What’s the occasion?~” Suzu smirked, “Anyone we know?~”

“Oh shut up!” Yamato snapped, heading over to put down his bag, “I have new songs for you guys but if you’re going to be assholes, forget it.”

Suzu’s eyes lit up immediately, “New songs? Already? Did you get on another kick and write an album over the weekend?” 

“No I-” Yamato blushed furiously, his cheeks puffing up, “-I only wrote a few of these this weekend. I already had a lot of these. I just...the situation changed, ok? These are ok to look over now.” 

Haru blinked a bunch, coming over to investigate before Yamato changed his mind about sharing whatever these were, “I hope it was a good sort of change?” 

Yamato looked away. “You...could say that, yeah.” 

“Well...congratulations then!” Haru smiled brightly, opening Yamato’s bag and taking out a few of the ones he’d added that were previously ripped out to look them over, Suzu quickly coming to read them over his shoulder.

Keiji got nearer to join them all, taking a little longer since he had to get off the floor. “Whatever gave Yamato a good weekend and us more songs, I’m grateful. We can’t go sitting around basking while this album’s out, we’ve got to be working on the next one and...Yamato is that a hickey?” 

Yamato stiffened and quickly pulled his shirt to cover whatever Keiji had seen. “That’s none of your business.” 

“Oh my god, Yamato, you’re late because you were with somebody? Holy fuck.” Suzu looked up to laugh at that. “You never let your dates get that kind of control in your schedule.” then, with a sly sparkle in his eye he added, “Does this mean Taichi’s free now?~”

Yamato actually turned and gave him a proper glare, “No! And shut up!” 

Suzu whistled in surprise, then laughed, holding up his hands in mock surrender. “I give, I give. No dice on getting with your hubby while you’re foolin around.”

“Damn right.” Yamato shook his head with a soft laugh of his own. 

“I thought you didn’t like writing love songs, Yamato.” Haru commented idly, still looking over the works.

“He has love songs in there? No way! Are they any good? Yamato, we’ve been trying to write a good one for forever, what gives holding out on us?” Keiji immediately jumped to take the pages from Haru to look over. “Holy shit this is some intense feelsy stuff - it’d sell like hotcakes.”

“There’s more sex songs too…” Suzu noted, taking his section of the pile, “Non-vague ones too, sheesh, somebody’s thirsty.”

“Is that what you meant by things changed?” Haru asked idly. 

Yamato bristled again, but didn’t answer, instead leaning against the wall and crossing his arms over his chest. “You three can’t be satisfied with anything can you? I finally let you guys have stuff you’ve been demanding, and you complain.”

“Oh I’m not complaining...but I do wonder if this means we’re going to start seeing Taichi at more practices… after all...inspiration seems to work well for you…” Haru said softly and for being the quietest of them, that devilish smile on him was the worst. 

“I hate you all.” Yamato facepalmed, but behind it he smiled a bit. Yeah...yeah this could work. See how people took seeing this side of him. Letting a little of it out had gotten him exactly what he’d wanted, after all...maybe he could survive this.


End file.
